Have you ever thought, “my child is at the perfect age” or “things have got to get better, if I can just survive this stage”? I have to admit to thinking that the former was true more than the latter. I hesitate to admit it since that might bring a series of rotten ages and stages down upon me ;+)
When Reid was a tiny, she nursed with a ferocity that startled me. Her eyes would scrunch closed and she would nurse like it was the only thing in her world. She slept with equal intensity and occasionally opened her eyes to look at us like she wondered why we happened to her. I had a few moments where I wondered why I didn’t have one of those babies who gazed adoringly at their mamas when they were nursing but someone explained the babies from the books and pamphlets were older. I was glad for a baby that wasn’t yet mobile as Ken and I had much to learn about being parents, for all of our experience with relatives’ and friends’ kids. My favourite Reidism of this age was her ability to fight her arms free of the tightest swaddling. Sometimes Ken and I would watch her do it, just for entertainment.
Once Reid had done enough “tummy time” and developed the muscles for moving on to bigger and better things, like moving on her own, for instance. She learned to crawl when Ken was in Holland for VE Day ceremonies for work. At first, she showed her new found skill to Uncle Roge and then played possum, or possum statue, for a couple of days. I was proud of her skills and it ushered in an era of me having a buddy in the bathroom. Since I could no longer trust her to stay put, I put her on her potty chair and read her books whenever I needed to use the bathroom. From about 9 months on, Reid was dry in her diaper during the day and I was a bit puffy with the pride of it. We also read many, many books together and that was a great thing on its own.
Toddlerhood was fabulous in its own way, of course. Having a walking, talking, little person kept us busy. Reid became best friends with a little girl at daycare and showed her opinions in so many other ways. Reid has always had clear preferrences but as a toddler she was able to tell us about them. I felt like I was finally getting to know a person that I had been spending so much time with. Nursing was an adventure with Reid – she was an acrobatic little creature, nursing while balancing on foot and in other improbable positions but at night she was silent and snuggly and just as intense as she was when she was an infant.
The more words that Reid has, the more I have found her to be an interesting little person. I have loved her from the beginning but as she mastered her verbal skills, the nature of our relationship has become more complex. I have always tried to – and succeeded at – enjoy the age that Reid is but I know that I was eager for her to have the words to tell what she wants and thinks. From her signs for “milk”, “more”, “book” and “all done” as baby of 12 or 13 months to the wonderful, chatty two’s, I welcomed each word.
At 3, Reid continues to talk a great deal at home. She is perfecting her grammar, paying attention to rhyme and being silly with words. We might wish for a few moments of quiet but we’d never wish away her words. Reid tells us her hopes and fears and plans out how she will achieve the former and deal with the latter. When I tried to wean Reid from nursing to sleep, at what turned out to be a stressful time in her life, she was clear about her position on the matter. She said, “I love milkies and I want milkies and I want milkies.” Since then, she has talked about being too old to nurse but hasn’t followed through on her decision to go asleep on her own. We’ll try again when it is the right age for her.
Each age has had its challenges but each has been so wonderful that I was sad to see it pass until it became apparent that the next would be just as good. When I’m tempted to rush a skill or habit, I remind myself of how Reid has somehow managed to grow to 3 years of age in just 2 weeks and stop and savour the time. If we’re present in the moment, each age is just the right one for our child to be.
This post was inspired by the group writing project over at MamaBlogga but I’m always glad to think back to the “good, old days”.
Wow, Reid sounds like an amazing little girl. You sound so very proud of her. A lovely post.
I love Reid’s response to your attempt to wean her from nursing to sleep!
What a wonderful entry! It sounds like you have a great perspective on motherhood—and childhood!
Thanks for participating.
What a beautiful post and a great reminder to savor each age for its own sweetnesses.
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